Saturday, June 5, 2010

It's been a while

I have missed an entire month of writing. Being a working mom is much harder than I thought. It doesn't leave a lot of time for anything. Being a mother, being a wife, being a friend, or even just being myself. You are constantly pulled in every direction. There are only 24 hours in the day. And sleep has escaped you for more months than you can remember. But as I move forward, now in my fourth month of being a working mother, I am somehow learning how to juggle all the hats that I need to wear. The most rewarding still being that of mother.

When you first become a mother, everyone informs you that they will grow. Quickly. They will change before your eyes, and before you know it, they will be teenagers, young adults, and before you know it. Adults. And you say "I know." And you DO know. But somehow, no matter how much you know, you have no idea at all. They grow so fast. Every week that passes alters their life for ever.

The last time that I wrote extensively about E she was 1 week, and 1 day away from 6 months. E is now 7 months and 2 weeks. So only about 2.5 weeks away from 8 months. Wow, 2 months has passed. And she isn't even remotely the same baby. In fact, I fear that I can't really call her a baby at all.

E rolls like a made woman. For a while there was some fear she wouldn't bother with crawling at all, since she was such an "advanced" roller. She still isn't crawling, but she did start scooting. Backwards mostly. Daddy likes to say that E is "stuck in reverse." Which I find endlessly funny, since everything is somehow car related to Daddy. He has dedicated a great deal of time trying to show E how to "go forward". She watches him crawl around the living room floor and they bond in a way that amazes me.

Sometimes watching Daddy be a daddy is as rewarding as being a Mommy, or watching E grow and learn. Before you get married you get to know your spouse as a person. You find out what they like, what they do, who they are. Then you get married. You learn who they are as a spouse. How you will divide the labor of life, the money in your life, how do you juggle being a married couple, a spouse and keep your own identity. Then you have a child. And somehow, all the other parts dissolve. And you get to relearn each other. How do you juggle all these parts of your life. And you learn something even more fundamental. I don't think you know your spouse. Until you see them as a parent. It alters you forever. And as this started... Daddy loves E with such passion. And as E has grown, my dominant role as Mommy has been replaced with a shared role as parent. E needs Daddy. Now E needs Daddy in ways she had always needed Mommy. E needs someone who can play with her. I don't know why it is. But Daddy's just play differently than Mommy's. And after all that time, of being the primarily demanded upon parent. You can finally sit back and just admire them both.

Again, I digress, it's been a while, I have a lot to say. So the point here, is E is trying to learn how to crawl. She can scoot backwards. Then beginning just about a week ago, for the first time we saw her pull her knees in under her. VICTORY! Crawling might be in our future after all. Over the past week she's master pulling those little knees in and rock back and forward on her hands and knees. She will crawl.

I want to talk about food, but before I talk about food. Let's talk about daycare. Because it's a fact of every working parent's life. No matter what road you choose, in home daycare, a family member, a small daycare, or a national chain. Working parents must leave their little one with someone else. So I researched E's daycare extensively. And still, we couldn't be happier. E loves her daycare. I think she likes the other children, but she is very attached to the staff. Which is so important. E gets excited when we're on our way to daycare and gets bouncy and happy when you take her out of the car in the parking lot. She is happy to see Ms. K in the morning and enjoys her time with Ms. J in the afternoon. She misses daycare when she's not there. In fact I think she's bored when she's home with us. But I'll touch on that later. The point is, she loves daycare, and they love her there too. Aside from her teachers, the administrative staff has taken an interest in her, and she is never short on love. So E plays, E makes art projects, and most of all, E eats.

So let's talk about eating. Just before E turned 6 months. We started eating solids. I was on a mission to make E's baby food. I did. She loved it. Unfortunately, E has decided home made baby food was good. But finger food is even better. She has passed what I fondly refer to as "the moosh" and moved on to finger foods with reckless abandon. Thankfully her daycare serves breakfast/lunch. And it's included in our tuition. And Ms. K has the dedication to take whatever is being served for lunch, and make it finger food for E. She eats just about anything, from turkey and cheese sandwiches, cheese quesadilla, chicken nuggets, pasta, to bagels, french toast, bananas, carrots, and broccoli. Truth be told, I'm having a hard time finding this 7 months old tummy bottom. She eats like her Daddy. And will very well eat from when we get home until bedtime if we let her.

So E has grown so much. She's becoming a little girl. She's a joy to play with and she's starting to show signs of affection. Resting her head on your shoulder when she's tired. Wrapping her arms around your neck. Lifting her arms up when she wants to be picked up. She talks to the cats endlessly, and she's trying really hard to talk to us as well. She will probably communicate with the cats before she succeeds with us. Although Daddy and I are pretty sure she nodded her head one night when I asked if she wanted more pasta.

As always - - Who Dropped the Pacifier?


  1. I was starting to worry that you had stopped posting here . . . glad to have you back :-)

    We, too, are dealing with the "crawling backward" thing, though he's getting really good at getting where he needs to go by rolling, scootching, and just "being a baby". Unfortunately, his most favorite target is the grumpiest dog.

  2. John - Thanks. I lay in bed sometimes and think of things I'd like to say. But it's the constant battle... get sleep... make bottles... clean up... work... etc... etc... etc... I'm sure you know how it is. And E is the same way about the pets. When she can move on her own will they are in for a big wake up call. And like your experience, she can travel via rolling, scoothing and as you said, just being a baby gets her tons of places, places she didn't even know she WANTED to go. LOL. Thanks for the encouragement!

  3. Wonderful post. It brought back memories of going through those phases with my boys. C was a "scootcher" for sure and we kept worrying that the rocking on hands and knees would land him with many black and blue eggs on his head. It appears that through that experience he determined that his head - forehead in particular - was his brake for stopping any forward motion - so we quite often still get the black and blue eggs on the head. And he's fine. Figuring out the balance is another challenge that I still figure out every single day and change regularly as my kids needs change. I think it will be unsteady state for quite a few years yet - read - forever. But you're right, it is awesome! Good luck and prayers.. Heather